Today would have been Nathaniel's 13th birthday! Wow! That is hard for me to even imagine.
See I still see him as that three year old that was filled up with joy and laughter. It's hard for me to even try to imagine what he would look like, act like or anything else. He is frozen in my mind at 3 years old. While I would love to know what he would be like, I'm okay with that 3 year old image. He was a precious boy, so I'm filled up with good memories.
So today I might be a little sad. Today I might cry because I miss him. But I know I will smile because of my fond memories. I know I will chuckle while looking at his sweet pictures. And I know he is in a better place, with no ouchies, no pain and no struggles. While this mama longs for a chance to hug him, I also take great peace in knowing he is completely healed. . . as completely as one can get.
Here is a post I wrote 4 years ago. . . .
I'll be back on Monday. This weekend I shall soak up every minute I can with my family. I know all too well that you may not have as long as you think. Never take them for granted.