Can I Really Say It Was Good?

Sunday is always an exhausting day, but 99.99999 percent of the time a very blessed, joyous, God-filled day.  This is a post for Monday, but I'm writing it at 10:46 pm on Sunday.  Today was one of those amazing, powerful, blessed days that at the end of the day, you lay down, sigh contentedly and say, "Thank you Lord for a wonderful day."  Don't get me wrong, I got my praise on ,got preached too, had my toes lovingly stepped on, prayed, and the list goes on, but it was a wonderful day.  Sunday on the social media sites are bursting with the shouts of awesome services throughout the country and even the world (depending on who you are connected to).

Then Monday cometh.  Monday morning on Facebook and twitter tend to be negative places.  The sadness that the weekend has ended, the frustrations of morning rush hour that always seems worse on Monday (I used to work outside the home, I know) and just the general bemoaning because it's a Monday.  People expect Monday to be bad.  We expect the worst from co-workers, bosses, clients/customers, school mates and of course, rush hour.  We wake up expecting to have a rough day, even I, a stay-at-home mom, tend to wake up exhausted, in need of day of recovery and most of the time expect my children to be cranky and little squirrelly.  

After just a few hours of sleep, we wake up grumpy and expecting to have a rough day, forgetting the amazing blessings just 15 hours, give or take, earlier.  All the hot air has been let out of our balloon and we are deflated.  Drudgery of a new week has replaced our happiness (can't be joy or it wouldn't be that easily replaced) as we venture off into our Monday adventures.

So this is my question:  What will do on Monday with what God did for you or to you on Sunday?

What if we woke up expecting a good day instead of a bad one?  Or expecting to feel God's presence despite the fact that the week has indeed began anew?  Or even better, ready to share with others the testimony of our awesome Sunday?  If we were really impacted, changed and challenged on Sunday, shouldn't our Monday's look different?  

If not, can we really say Sunday was good?

Illusion

***I must preface this blog post with this:  This is NOT a post of judgement.  It is simply what God put on my heart this early Monday morning to share with others.***



Facebook is the ultimate play land  to play out whatever life you choose.  It is also the ultimate place to hide who you truly are or to completely (and sometimes to an extreme) reveal your true self.

As I was on Facebook this morning, most of my friends were still posting about what God did yesterday at church or what God did for them or to them at UPCI General Conference.  Awesome things happened for many people, myself included.  And the first thing that popped into my mind was the old saying, "actions speak louder than words".  With the development of social media we have a unique tool not given to generations before us, that we can reach hundreds, if not thousands of people with our words without ever leaving our homes or even getting out of our pj's.  It is so very easy to talk about what God did, spoke or miraculously produced, but talk is cheap.  Right?   Some of my friends on Facebook never and I mean never post a status update.  They are on there to say Happy Birthday to friends far and near and look at pictures and possibly chat with a friend, but you never see a status of what's going on in their life.  And that's okay, nothing wrong with that.  Other friends are on Facbook just here and there, maybe connecting with a group (like I do with the homeschool group and church group) and to just share snippets of their lives.  Others, like myself, have business pages or church pages to keep people up-to-date on all the wonderful news.  For others though, Facebook is a place to play out every single detail of their lives, from what they ate for breakfast to who they hate and love.  We all read every snarky comment or every phrase of praise that is plastered to their wall, and often it's within the same hour.  We read how some people have been lazy all day and how some have apparently not only cleaned their entire home but the homes of all their neighbors too.  I am being somewhat facetious, but you know what I mean.  Their entire life is played out on Facebook and/or Twitter for all the world to see.  I call them fish bowl Facebookers.  We seemingly know all that they do, believe, pray, dream of, what team they root for, their cosmic cleaning abilities, favorite books, food, TV shows, music and the list just goes on and on.  The problem with Facebook is this, we can post whatever we want and for some this is a golden opportunity to create themselves to others the way they wish they could be and not they way they truly are.  It's a chance to be okay when we are really depressed, the opportunity to be an on fire prayer warrior when really our faith is wavering, a soul winner with Kingdom on the mind when really we haven't talked to a person about God in a very long time.  On Facebook you can be the busiest person according to your status updates when really all you did was read statuses all day.  On Facebook you can be a gourmet chef everyday of your life, when really you had take out.  On Facebook you can be the most spiritual person ever, when in actuality you haven't had a real conversation with God in days or weeks or well, maybe longer.

I believe we can read a Biblical account similar to what I just typed out, found in Matthew 23.  Whew!  You all should read that whole chapter (I did.  Good stuff people, good stuff), Jesus got all over those Pharisee's for their hypocritical lifestyle.  Here is a small snippet of Matthew 23:

Then Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples,  “The scribes and the Pharisees teach with Moses’ authority. So be careful to do everything they tell you. But don’t follow their example, because they don’t practice what they preach.  They make loads that are hard to carry and lay them on the shoulders of the people. However, they are not willing to lift a finger to move them."

What am I saying?  Yes, it is possible to be a hypocrite by way of social media.  The Pharisee's had authority to speak into the lives of those around them.  Jesus said to, "do what they tell you, but DON'T follow their example."  Basically, follow the teachings because that is God's way, the Torah, but do not act like them because they do not practice what they preach.  Listen to God's word, but also act out God's word.  It's powerful to me that Jesus spoke of the burden these leaders placed on the people but they themselves would not carry such a load.  It's not unlike those that tell others to be faithful when they themselves are not.  It's not unlike those who want to invite people to church but then don't want to help transport them there or be available to help disciple them.  If we say we are Kingdom minded then our actions will bear out the fruit of those words, just like if you say you have cleaned your house for twelve hours straight you should have no problem if I just "drop by".  It all comes back to our actions preaching, teaching, speaking louder than our words or statuses ever will.

Eventually you will leave your house (hopefully anyway) and the true fish tank will be revealed.  Will the world, your friends, your church family see what you posted as who you are or will they see another Pharisee, a lot of words and no actions backing them up.  This is the thing about fish tanks that is so beautiful, they are a creation of their owner, each tank unique.  What the owner chooses to put in the tank is what we see.

Who is creating your fish tank life?  Is the master Creator putting things in you that we can see and believe and trust and follow?  Or are you creating a fish tank life you want every one to believe is real but once exposed for viewing is just. . . . . .fake?


***I must also this is post was created because of what God laid on my heart to share, not because people were sharing their Sunday or General Conference experiences.  I love reading what God did in churches and lives on Sunday and special conferences. It just happened to coincide.  The topic was formed a couple of weeks ago and this morning God reminded me that actions speak louder than words (and that was the piece I needed for this post) and what we say and committed unto God, even though it's Monday and we aren't surrounded by like minded people, we must follow through unto Him.  God reminded me that it's easy to say we are going to do this or that when we are in  the flow of His presence but it must be carried out every day life.  I am also not saying that is bad to post about your team, books, etc.***

Not a Giant Chess Piece

How many times have you heard someone liken life to a game? Or even use the phrase to the "game of life"? And no I don't mean the board game either. Countless times, I'm sure.  But sometimes, I will admit it, feels like that, like I spun a spinner and whatever it landed on, that was my fate.

A few weeks ago in our mid week Bible study we were singing a worship song. I'll be honest, I have no recollection of the song because God and I were communing and while the song helped usher in the spirit of worship, God took over and I cannot for the life of me remember. I think I know why, but I have to stay on track so I'll come back to why. . .a post for another day.

Anyway, while standing in the very sweet, but overwhelming presence of God that night all that I kept saying was, "I am so thankful you reign, so thankful you reign." While talking to God, He spoke to my heart. That is supposed to happen, you know God speaking to us, so I wasn't surprised and you shouldn't be either. He ministered to me what I needed, not necessarily that night, but something that I would need to draw from later.  Probably soon too.

In my mind I saw the image of a giant, and I mean GIANT chess board, and on this board were people. Some I knew and some I did not. I was on there as well. There was a giant hand moving across the top of the pieces, as if deciding which on to move next and where. Then the Lord spoke to me and said, "often times this is what my children think I do. They believe me to be a game master moving people just here and there, with no direction, at my will. They and you, daughter, have mistaken who I Am. I am not sitting high and lofty above you, moving you at about at my pleasure as if to torment you. I dwell in and around you. I make your path clear, its not always an easy path, but I walk it with you. I am not making random decisions concerning your life. I am great, mighty and all powerful, but I hear your heart, I know your needs, I see your tears and your joy. I don't see your life as my game to play." At that moment the chess board and all it's people were gone. God spoke to me again, "you are not my play toys, neither as your children are yours. You are my treasured possession and you have chosen to live your life for me. I take great pleasure in communing with you, caring for you, providing for you, guiding, carrying your burdens and healing you. It's a relationship, not a game."

As I stood in worship service I was overwhelmed and uplifted by those comforting words. I took them in and held onto every word and wrote them down almost immediately. I knew I would need them for another day. And I have. I have often gone back to that night and replayed those comforting words. I have held tightly on when things didn't make sense or when fear threatened me from it's place of banishment. God isn't spinning the wheel to see where I go next! He isn't taking a chance card and wondering what's next! He's got this thing in control!  As in the book of Jeremiah, he tells the people of what God spoke in chapter 29 verse 11, "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." 

I know the Man in charge. I don't just know Him, but He knows me. And He's got me in the palm of His very giant hands and He does all things well.

I actually typed this post about two weeks ago.  I typed it all out and sat on it.  I knew God wanted me to write it out and post it here, but He told me to wait.  Tonight I feel it's time to post.  I hope someone reading it will hear it's message and find comfort in it. Blessings!!

A Scripture a Day. . . .

We will finish the title in a minute.

I am human. Yes, it's true. I know that you all think I'm a superhero, but I'm not. Just ask my husband. ~Smile~ I am just a woman that wears many hats. Some days I wear those hats well and some days, well some days I avoid the mirrors to avoid seeing disheveled I actually look. I have come to terms with my humanness, for I realize there is no cure. I make mistakes, I get grouchy (another shocking revelation, I know), I get tired, annoyed with other humans, frustrated, overwhelmed and more. I also get all the good stuff too, you like days of productivity, happiness, joyful, loving, content, creative, the list goes on. But the bottom line always comes back to me being a human, with all the frailties and talents allotted to humanity. And being a human not only keeps my feet on the ground, it keeps me in need of a Savior. I'm so glad I know one!

I'm getting to the real meat of this post, I promise.

A very anointed man I know has a saying, "instead of worrying about reading the Bible through, how about choosing a scripture or a passage and really living it". Meaning: not that reading the whole thing through is bad, but if you can't live it what's the point, right? Right! So I decided to choose a passage to work on living. I chose a passage in January and needless to say I'm still working on it. But as an addendum to picking a passage to live, I have been choosing a scripture to commit to memory every day or every few days depending on the scripture. Positive thinking takes on a whole new look when you aren't just thinking positive, but you are entreating the Word upon your situation. There is power in the Word of God. It is sharper than a two edged sword. It brings peace to a troubled heart. It gives direction. It encourages us to keep pressing on. It leads you to salvation. It reveals the Savior and His heart toward us, His children.

That old saying, "an apple day keeps the doctor away" got me thinking. Just like eating good, healthy food keeps our bodies functioning well, the Word of God is our nourishment for our spirit. Soul food, if you will (yes I had to go there). I know we know this, but we need to KNOW it, eat it, hide it in our hearts for the day that we need that Word and no one is calling to encourage us or writing on our facebook wall to uplift our hearts. Sometimes we just need a word, literally a Word. . . .straight from God's heart to mine. How much easier is it to have a Word when you can call it out without needing a concordance to find it again?! Instead of telling yourself how strong your are and that you can get through this, quote the scripture that "all things are possible through Christ who strengthens me". Because I know how strong I am alone and how strong He makes me.

A scripture a day keeps. . . .

. . . .Satan at bay (notice I did not say away, he will always keep trying)
. . . .a mama sane on a stressful day
. . . .a human heart connected to the one and only super power available
. . . .peace in the heart when fear tries to creep in
. . . .joy in place when sorrow threatens to overtake you

There is something about hiding the Word of God deep within your heart. Have I arrived? NO! Absolutely not! There are days where I haven't hidden a Word in my heart, I must try again the next day. I am human. I will still get frustrated, crabby, tired and so on. . . .it's why need the Word of God so desperately. Every. Single. Day.

Bringing the Laughter

Life is hard. Some days crawling into bed and staying there is the easiest and safest thing to do. . . but we all know that really isn't an option. Well, it's not an option for those who want to thrive and live in abundant joy. I know I opened with a negative, but just give me a minute, we'll get to a happy place, I promise.



During the day various things can entertain me, make me smile or laugh, make me think and just generally pass the time. Not that I need to have time passed more quickly because time usually speeds past me lightening fast. See I live with three entertainers, four really, but Hubs is gone all day. He's the evening entertainment. ~Smile~ My kids have the uncanny ability to make me smile, laugh, cry, scream (not that I would ever. . . . . not even I can say that with a straight face), question my sanity, question the decision to stay home, laugh some more and cherish the small things in life. All in a day. Sometimes all within ten minutes. Just depends on the day. See my kids, like most kids, say and do the most hilarious things, most of the time.

For instance. . .

While grading Makiah's school work I absolutely cracked up at one answer she had written down. She is learning about George Washington and the question concerned what national holiday he instated in 1789. Her answer: a national day of fasting. FASTING!! The answer was thanksgiving. When I questioned her, she answered thanksgiving. So then I asked her why she would put fasting in her book. She said, "well he was a president and I would think that would be something he would do and think is important." Oh my daughter! See laughter and cherishing the fact that she knows fasting is important.

Randomly the other day Daniel, otherwise known as the child who never, ever leaves my side, abandoned his cars and trucks, climbed up beside me, threw his little arm around my neck and said, "Mama, I love you more than ice cream." Melted heart. Greatest part of this. . . he had not just gotten in trouble! ~Laughter~ He brought sunshine into a regular moment. Smiling, cherishing the fact that he still wants to hug me. One day when he is older and wants to run far from my hugs, I'll remember the day I was more important than ice cream (which is a pretty big deal to a three year old).

Sam is the clown. Sometimes he is the clown without trying. If he did attend public school I feel certain I would be called in for numerous parent teacher conference for a plethora of reasons. The boy is a 3.5 foot, 55 pound whirling dervish that can sit still for a video game for HOURS, but cannot sit still in church to save his life. Maybe if the platform team and Pastor dressed as Mario characters?? Oh never mind, back to the funny. Sam is just finishing up Kindergarten. Around the first of February he will officially be in first grade, except for Math, which he is almost done with first grade math. I gave him his newest Math PACE and I said, "I need you to do this page first, do not skip ahead." He looked at the page of addition problems, put his elbow on the desk, his head in his hand and dryly responded, "You have to be kidding me, more adding problems. Don't they know I know this already?" I had to stifle laughter. I said, "Sam, practicing it over and over will help you get faster and make sure you really, really know it.". He said, "Mom, I need to be challenged." Stifling no longer worked. I cracked up. I said, "well son, I'll see what I can do, but in the meantime, do this page for me. Okay." He sighed, but he said, "Okay mama, I'll do it, but they need to make harder problems. This is 3 year old math." Sam had me laughing, thinking of how I can challenge him a little more in math and cherishing the fact that he loves to do math. I also bowed my head and prayed he would continue to love math this much forever considering the math battles with Makiah I currently face. He is creative and funny and a builder extraordinaire. He usually builds things so fantastic he has to make up a name for it. Like the day he built a blogger schnogger out of blocks and gears.

I won't give any examples of crying, but just know that Mommy guilt and Mommy needs peace and quiet enter the picture at least daily. . . prompting tears and/or banishment to their rooms. A mommy can only take so much. I won't say that I am driven to tears daily, but banishment at least once per day is a given. ~Smile~

The dear Lord knew that life would be hard sometimes. And some days would be hide under the cover days. He knew that we would need Him to survive. He built into the model of the family, be fruitful and multiply, little ones who would love us more than ice cream, need us, make us smile, make us laugh and they would also drive us to our knees in prayer for everything from our sanity to their salvation and back again. I know that God is the center of my joy (people disappoint) but I know God uses my kiddos daily to teach me, love me, show me how grace really works and last but certainly not least, as instruments of joy. The Bible says that a joyful heart does good like a medicine but a crushed spirit drys up the bones (Proverbs 17:22 ESV). So when life is difficult we must make a decision. . . either find the cheerful things that surround us and soak them up (and of course prayer makes a heart cheerful too). . . or dry up under the covers. For me, I prefer the first option.

As for my kids bringing the funny. . .I can count on it like the sun rising and setting. . . .

The Lovelock kids~spreading joys and toys wherever they may go.

Popsicle break with Daddy this past summer!

The Worst Four-Letter Word

A co-worker of Hubs once told him that, "the worst four-letter word is fear." While I absolutely deplore cursing, I am convinced it damages my ears, I tend to agree on this. Fear is debilitating, it will prey on you until you are devoured and that's the kind of preying you don't need!

On Saturday, while at my local hardware store, you know the kind that does not require a golf cart to go through, I saw a wanted poster. Now let me just say, I like my little suburb of the highest crime rate city in America. But my little corner of the Midwest, for the most part is calm. It kind of feels like a real small town, not like it's surround by 1.3 million other people. So you can imagine I was a little surprised to see a wanted poster in my little hardware store, from my police department and especially for the crime listed. Now I realize that crime happens every day, all around me but I have been very blessed to have only been the receiptent of theft and no threat was made to any physical beings in my family. Oh! Back to the hardware store (even in blogs I tend to ramble ~snicker~), there hung a wanted posted for a man who raped and sodomized a lady just a mile from my home. I was more than just a little startled. I felt so saddened and a little sick to my stomach. One for this poor lady who has been tramatized, but also that there is a person loose in my community, so close to home that is capable of such violence. I left after making my big $0.32 purchase (just doing my part for the local businessman) and went about my errands. I had several stops to make, all of them in my town. As I approached the final stop and started walking in, it dawned on me that I had been looking over my shoulder, watching the people around me, checking in my van before getting in and other nervous actions from someone feeling pursued. And I was being pursued. . .by fear.

Just that quickly fear had crept in and had me suspecting every man that passed me that was wearing a black scully. And do you know how many men in this metropolis wear a black scully?? Apparently it's the only color they make! God chose that moment to teach me something. Again Living in fear is the same as living in prison. A self-made prison. Don't get me wrong, there is a lot of things in this world that are scary. God knows that and He knew it when Paul penned this famous scripture to Timothy. . . .

"For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control."~~2 Timothy 1:7 ESV

God knew, in His infinite wisdom that scary things would abound and He spoke to His people that they have been given power, love and self-control (a post for another day). The spirit of fear is not just a simple, I need a night light until I'm 7 situation. The spirit of fear controlling. It keeps you from going certain places, doing certain things, it drives people to run away, fear of forging new relationships because of pasts hurts, it convinces some people of a threat that to those of us not fighting that spirit find irrational but to them it's very real and terrifying, for some it means that they don't even leave their home. . .ever. Some will never walk in their calling because of paralyzing fear, just what the enemy wants. It is a prison, keeping you from living life in God's abundance.

Here I am, an Apostolic, Holy Ghost filled daughter of the King and I'm looking over my shoulder at the mere thought of a criminal. Really?? If I really allowed myself to worry about every criminal in Highest Crime Rate, USA, I would never leave my house. I can't live like that! And God didn't intend it for me or you. Frightening things will always be all around us here on this Earth and I know things will only get worse, but God is always here, He sees and knows. Ever watching and protecting. He never changes. I have lived in fear of various things for a long time and as I am realizing the freedom of living in total peace, I won't trade that because scary things live in my town, city or even my block. I am not saying that you should take foolish risks, abandoning all common sense, I mean God gave us common sense for a reason. Some situations you should know to avoid. Wisdom comes from God too, use it.

But. . . .

Don't let fear bully you into a fear prison . .be a prisoner of Christ. . .sweet peace surrounds you there.

Well, That's A Pain! (THE Series, #1)

One major event that happened on 2011 was a diagnosis. Now I know you all are thinking, "I knew she was diagnosable, but not that kind of diagnosis. No, this diagnosis answered quite a few medical questions but also handed me a lifelong disease. I was diagnosised with Psoriatic Arthritis. What's that?? Let me tell you, condensed version. . . .

It is a cousin to Rheumotoid Arthritis, similar in its potential to be debilitating. It's painful and I have been put on limited physical activity (such as exercise). I take some pretty strong medications to try to enter remission and stop the progression of the disease. Some days the meds are worse than the disease, but for the most part it's all good. In March we'll see if these meds are working if not, injectables will be started. And no, I don't have psoriasis, just the arthritis. . .go figure.

While its rather painful some days and frustrating, I refuse to stop and allow the disease to control my life. I follow orders (mostly), take the medication and I'm not doing structured exercising but I'm not driving myself through Target (not that that is bad if you need it, but I'm not there. . .yet) either. I refuse to be a victim of a disease, I will go down swinging!

But, this post is not about what happened, entirely. . .its about this year. This is a post about what steps I'm taking this year to reclaim my health. BIG faith in Jehovah Rapha (God the healer of all your diseases) combined with a trust that if He chooses not to heal me, I know He will give me the strength to persevere. Either way He is for me!

But I'm doing my part for my health, here is just a few positive changes I'm making:

• Moving to a 95% plant based diet. Yes, that is basically vegetarian. I'm not committing to never having another turkey burger or some yummy curry chicken, but it will be few and far between.
• I have committed to this year FINALLY smashing my addiction to Dr. Pepper. Every year I have given up soda and sometimes for months and months, but somehow I always go back. It is bad for me, there is no good thing that comes from soda, so it's time to go our separate ways for good.
• Be a good patient and follow doctors orders while trusting in the Great Physician.
• There are more, but I'm trying not to be to listy.
  

I am believing for great health this year! Believing for healing or remission, a lifting on the ban of structured physical activity and to end this year in better health than I am today. God is able, my faith is great and I am committed to doing my part.

"Bless the LORD, O my soul: and all that is within me, bless his holy name. Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits: Who forgiveth all thine iniquities; who healeth all thy diseases; Who redeemeth thy life from destruction; who crowneth thee with lovingkindness and tender mercies; Who satisfieth thy mouth with good things; so that thy youth is renewed like the eagle's.~~Psalm 103:1-5

"Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed."~~Isaiah 53:4-5

"And he cried to the LORD, and the LORD showed him a log, and he threw it into the water, and the water became sweet. There the LORD made for them a statute and a rule, and there he tested them, saying, If you will diligently listen to the voice of the LORD your God, and do that which is right in his eyes, and give ear to his commandments and keep all his statutes, I will put none of the diseases on you that I put on the Egyptians, for I am the LORD, your healer.”~~Exodus 15:25-26 (There is so much good stuff in these two scriptures, I could do 5 posts on them, but another time. Just know these scriptures in Exodus are POWERFUL)

I have faith in Jehovah Rapha first. . . the doctors are just here to see the miracle.

A Testimony, A Testimony!!

God is amazingly faithful! God is my Jehavoh-Jirah!! I am abundantly blessed!

My children and I witnessed first hand a miracle this morning. This story is humbling and faith building all in one. I went to Whole Foods to buy our meat for the next few weeks. I grabbed up what we needed and proceeded to checkout. The total stopped at $178 and I cringed a little inside but I wasn't going to change my mind about what I was purchasing. I swiped my card and the lady said, "ma'am I'm sorry but your card isn't working." My heart started pounding and I would have loved to just melt into the floor. I was baffled. I knew there was money in there. So I asked her to suspend my transaction while I called the number. My card was not going to work in that moment. I was confused and mortified and a little stressed because we needed groceries. I pulled the manager (who had bagged my groceries) over where I was off to the side and told her that my card was not working and I was sorry but there was just no way for me to pay and that after I figured everything out I would be back. Again, melting at that point would have been preferred! The young mother behind me in the line had just put her last bag in her cart. She stepped over and said, "I don't mean to interrupt, but I feel like I should pay for your groceries." I was dumbstruck. I attempted to stutter out I can't ask for that but before I could she responded with, "you didn't ask and it's what I want to do". Before I even knew what happened, I was being handed a receipt, being hugged by a stranger and walking out with $178 blessing.

~~PRAISE BREAK~~

I cried the whole way home, thanking God for His provision. I told the Lord over a week ago that I am giving all of our financial situations to Him, fully and left it there. And today God showed me He does hear me, He knows where I am and He knows full well my needs.

If you have doubts that God provides. If you think God doesn't care, isn't listening or doesn't know your needs. . . you are thinking wrong. Let my miracle testify to you of God's unfailing faithfulness!!!

"I have been young, and now am old; yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging their bread."~~Psalm 37:25

"He provides food for those who fear him; he remembers his covenant forever."~~Psalm 111:5

"Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and yet God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds!"~~Luke 12:24

"And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus."~~Phillipians 4:19

I know I said a series was coming, but I just had to tell of God's blessings! Tomorrow is the first installment of the series of new year, new me.

The End is Near

Of the year that is. I can't believe another is ending. It's been an interesting year, that's for sure. I said that this year would be epic. . . .and it was, just not in the way I was expecting. But it's okay because that means 2012 gets to be magnificent, mind blowing even. It's called expectancy. I am expecting great, marvelous, awe-inspiring things and I am refusing to accept anything less.

I am very excited about 2012. But I'll blog about 2012 later.

2011 was frought with highs and lows that I don't even know if I could adequately put into words. When I think of this year in review I am amazed by God's grace, mercy and faithfulness. Despite the lows and within the highs God's fingerprints are all over 2011. Here are just a few highlights:

• March-miscarriage of Lovelock baby #5
• April-my baby turned 3
• May-my sweet girl turned 10 (she is a whole post alone)
• May-my husband was blessed with a wonderful new job
• May-God started dealing with me on deep heart level that would take me to the wilderness and teach me about me and re-teach me about Him
• June-the first man to join our church plant received the Holy Ghost and baptized in Jesus name!
• July-his fiancé started coming to Bible study and received the Holy Ghost on the patio of St. Louis Bread Co. And then we baptized her
• September-I was diagnosed with Psoriatic Arthritis. I finally had a reason for extreme pain and I started treatment. No exercise at all. I'm still praying for remission. But God is teaching me to count it all joy.
• October-God brought me to new place in Him and showed me what I needed to do about certain areas of my life (this is just more of the same journey started in May). And restored my joy, the joy I hadn't even really realized I had lost.
• November-I picked up my crochet hooks again and I rediscovered my creativity and love for crochet projects.
• December-brought a flurry of activities, church functions and Christmas travel. I made a decision to open an Etsy shop, I have spent a lot of time reviewing this year, making new commitments for next year and making life changing decisions.

It's been quite a year. I left out a lot of details that are just to personal to share or would just be overload, but God took me into the wilderness and I'm journeying to a place of complete sufficiency in Him. I'm still learning, growing and walking in this wilderness. But that's okay, I'm learning to like it out here, in this place where I can hear God so clearly.

While I can't say it was a bad year I can say that closing the chapter that is 2011 is good thing. I'm ready for the next chapter. The next chapter of my personal walk with God, my family and great things in store for The Movment. I'm ready for the highs and the inevitable lows of 2012 because I know God does all things well and no matter the situation, He has it well in hand.

It's the Christmas Season. . . . .

and I can't believe it's been so long since I posted!!! Time is flying past me and I am holding on for dear life!

A quick update:

Fall is over, pumpkins put away and snowmen litter my dining room, living room and kitchen. Thanksgiving was wonderful! My parents came here, I cooked the meal and we just relaxed, played games and had fun. We went on a very quick trip to see friends in Indiana and now we are working on finishing up school work for our Christmas break!!

My fingers are flying, I have many crochet orders to get finished up for Christmas, not to mention the gifts I need to finish. I am loving it though!! I feel my creative juices flowing again, which also helps me to post here! I will post pics here when everything gets done (and given away, I would hate for the receivers to see before Christmas)!

This year has been one of great changes for me in lots of ways, some good, some not so good. There will be more about this in a later post, but from all this life-changiness has come an in depth study of Proverbs 31. Yes, I know, for most women its "the dreaded" chapter of Proverbs. God has been giving me some wonderful insight into this passage as well as working on my heart. I will be sharing some on here too.

I have so much to write about, talk about, praise God for and pray about and I have missed blogging and reading blogs, but I have been dedicating myself to time management. I am ready to add all things bloggy back onto my plate without too much of the plate getting taken up.

Now, back to teaching, I am pretty sure they are running amuck. . . I can blog when they sleep! ~Laughter~

In Hidding

I've been in hiding.

You know how sometimes we must travel into the deep cave of ourselves and and do some, or in my case, much self evaluating~~that is me, currently.

In the last year I have been a terribly inconsistent blogger and even worse at reading all of your lovely blogs. I am aware of this problem and I am going to fix it, because I miss you all!!

When I emerge from this cave of self evaluation, I will emerge a better wife, a better mom, a better Christian and even a better blogger and bloggity friend too.

Please don't give up on Mamalovelock. I will return. Soon.

Roller Coaster

I do have good reasons for not blogging in the last two weeks. Let me explain.

On February 5th, I got some rather shocking news. I found out that I was expecting again. After about 24 hours of not knowing how to feel, excitement took over and I quickly got used to the idea.

On February 8th the doctor confirmed and I was truly excited. Hubs was still a little in shock. Deer in headlights, best way to describe him. ~Smile~

A week later (Valentine's Day) I had more blood work done to make sure that the numbers were going up correctly. They were not.

After a week of riding an emotional roller coaster, not knowing what was going to happen and being on bed rest the doctor got the results of the last blood draw on Monday.

Miscarried. Another little Lovelock was not to be. Its been an emotional two weeks.

God is faithful. God has given me peace in the midst of my sadness.

Normal blog fodder continues to accumulate and I will be back, I just need a few more days.

Remodeling From the Inside Out

Amazing things have already begun. 2010~~we've stepped off into faith and the journey will take us up hills, across rivers, over bridges and right over mountains, all while knowing that God is leading us, carrying us and protecting us. Part of the process is internal, personal, life changing.

Remodel: –verb (used with object), -eled, -el⋅ing or (especially British) -elled, -el⋅ling.

1.	to model again.

2.	to reconstruct; make over.

That would be me, I'm undergoing a make over. You know occasionally you have to look in the mirror and say, "you need a change woman", "you need to do ______", you should really ______". Most of the time when we think of a make over, we think hair, shoes, clothes (which I won't turn down shoes and clothes if you're offering). But I'm talking about a make over that starts within. An update, so to speak. The Bible says in Luke 12:48 For unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required: and to whom men have committed much, of him they will ask the more. The last few days this has been me, looking in the mirror. Though it's not always easy, its ALWAYS necessary. Its how we grow, realizing the areas we lack in and making changes. This scripture as been a constant thought here the last few days. I have been given so much and am about to be given more, I need to change some things and give more of myself.

One of my priorities this year is more Bible. That was not an incomplete sentence. That's what I am making a priority, putting more Bible in our day, starting with me. Back in the day, a senior in high school I was, I read the Bible through in a year. It was awesome! I have for several years wanted to repeat that goal. This is my year! I went out and bought a One Year Bible (no more charts and check marks) and I am loving it!! I actually bought the Chronological Bible and I am enjoying it so much. It is what it's called, chronological. Nothing like reading the book of Job in the middle of Genesis, when it actually happened. I use my other Bibles for study, but my time with daily reading is just to feed my spirit, its watering my orchard you could say.

Another way we are adding more Bible into our day is having Bible time, three times a day. I know you are thinking, WHAT?! It has been great. We have morning devotions (which aren't new). We have a short, like 10 minutes or less devotion and then we each pray, Mama, Makiah and Sam. And daddy too, if he's here, most of the time he has already left for the day. Then around lunch time we either listen to the Bible on CD or work on our memory passage. Then in the evening when we are winding down we read a story before bed, but we also read a few scriptures together and of course night night prayers. I want to teach my children that God~prayer and Bible reading should be a part of their day no matter how busy we are. If I teach them young then they won't have to learn this concept when they are older. We teach by example. If I read my Bible despite the many things I have to do, they will know that Bible reading is a priority.

Makiah has been asking and asking for the Word of Promise Next Generation Audio Bible for about three months. We bought it for her about two weeks ago. I gave it to her and the reaction I got was amazing. I actually think she was more excited about the audio Bible than her DS she got for Christmas. I was thrilled about that! I want her to have a heart for God and His word. I don't want her to ever lose that. Yesterday in devotion we were talking about all the things we should and shouldn't do (rules of the house basically) and she said, "whew, sometimes it's hard to always do the right thing, but I know God will give me the strength to do it." My heart soared and instantly I prayed, never let her forget that.

See my remodel won't just affect me, my whole family, my friends and those I'm trying to reach out too, will get the benefits too.

On the Cusp of Sharing

There is BIG news that I have been keeping for about four months now. No, I'm not pregnant. That's what a LOT of people love to think of first. In just a few short days I'll be able to completely fill in all my bloggity friends, but I'll have to keep you in suspense a couple days longer. Just know that this is HUGE.

As for the rest of this post, a list, that's what I have today friends~a list:

1. I have lost 13 pounds since January 1st. Ecstatic!

2. Daniel was discharged from a second therapy (Speech) today. Two done, one to go. The boy speaks in full sentences now, he does not need speech therapy. God is so good!!

3. I am still cleaning out toys, closets and stuff! Ugh! I want to get it done, but sickness, school and playing Wii seem to get in the way. Don't judge, 'kay?

4. In my Haiti post last week I told you about A and R, well R landed in Florida yesterday and is traveling to his new home in the Midwest to part of a beautiful family stateside!! I fully believe God is working on taking care of the littlest victims of the Haiti earthquake.

5. My laundry is piled high again. I want to know who is using all these clothes??!??

6. God is so good to me and I can't wait to share all the mini miracles that are happening to us!!

Well, this concludes my terrific Tuesday post. I hope you all are having a blessed day!

Faith, Family and Frugality

Happy New Year!! May it be blessed and joyful!!

The other day I had a big, long post up about my thoughts on the new year. I came back a day later and took it down. It wasn't a bad post, I just didn't think it made sense to anyone outside of my brain, which is everyone. So in the interest of keeping the two readers I have and not appearing to be a babbling, sleep deprived mama, this is my new New Year post.

Every year we sit down and create new ways to frustrate ourselves (resolutions) and feel guilty (failing at those resolutions) and so this year I am not setting resolutions. I am however setting some goals, which we all should do, we should all be working toward something. I have thought of a great way to sum up exactly what I want in the year 2010~~Healthy in Every Way. Most of the time we use the term healthy when speaking of our physical beings or our mental status. I am speaking in terms of faith, family, frugality. First I sat down and decided what the definition of healthy is. I went to dictionary.com and this is what they had to say: prosperous or sound, vigor or vitality. So then I went from there and came up with how to accomplish this for each section.

Healthy Faith: Maintaining our relationship with God should be our first priority. I want to be an ever growing Christian. Infusing faith and the knowledge of who God is into our children and others, is our most important job. Being home with the kiddos and homeschooling, I have the opportunity to teach and use Godly principles all through the day. This year I want to do better at that. More devotions and Bible memory games. Those are the tools I have for teaching them the Word of God, which I want buried deeper in their hearts than math or science. I also want to live my life the way Christ would want me to live. I am His daughter, I represent Him. I want to make HIM proud. This year for me personally, I want to be an orchard of spiritual fruit that others can come and partake of. I want to produce patience (Lord know He has to help me with this one), longsuffering, gentleness, meekness, love, peace, temperance, goodness and faith. Galations 5:22-23 The Bible says in Matthew chapter 7 that you are known by your fruit, either corrupt or good. I don't want to be "known", but I do want to show others Christ through the way I live and not just the words I say.

Healthy Family: Of course there are the most obvious answers are cooking healthy meals (don't get me wrong we do, but we could eat at home more often) and doing more physical activities together. But then there is spending more time together~playing games, reading books and just generally being together. Teaching manners as part of our curriculum in school. These are just some examples.

Healthy Finances: I think most people I know could stand to have healthier finances. Who wouldn't like to put more in savings this year? I am changing our budget around and we will be spending less, saving more (we are planning a BIG vacation for the fall of 2010) and getting some things paid off. I have become the coupon cutting queen and I love a good deal. No reason to pay full price when I can save a few cents here and there. God is my provider and I have never gone without, but God also asked us to be good stewards of what we have been given. So tightening the budget, making cuts here and there, isn't hard, when you know all you have comes from Him in the first place.

As for me personally I have lots of things I want to change, be better at or make thinner (a hem, cough, cough) this year. This is going to be a big year, in a lot of ways. I was writing in my journal the other night and at the bottom of the page there is a scripture. This one jumped up and hit me in the head. Yes, it was that profound to me. "Commit whatever you do to the Lord and your plans will succeed." Proverbs 16:3 NIV I also like the way the GWT (God's Word Translation) put it, "Entrust your efforts to the Lord and your plans will succeed." How powerful is that promise?!?! So many things we try to do on our own and we fail. I do this often. Not anymore, everything I do I am committing to God. Whatever plans we are making, we are committing to God and He will establish the way.

There are many things I want to change, make better or get thinner this year! This is the year of change. This is the year of FAITH and of MIRACLES.

Christmas Recovery

Isn't funny how after Christmas you need a vacation to recover from all the opening of gifts, cooking, traveling, singing and other Christmas shenanigans?? I still feel like I need a nap!

We had a fabulous Christmas!! Not only did we get great gifts but we just had a really good time laughing and playing games and enjoying each others company. We had Christmas with all our presents at my parents house Christmas Eve. It was an opening frenzy! Makiah did get her requested pink DS and Sam a Leapster. They got other stuff too, but I won't bore you with all those details. I got a new broach and an old broach. I was ecstatic to get one of my Nanny's broaches. It is beautiful~I will treasure it. I got some clothes and other stuff too. Hubs got a Wok, he was very happy. He also got clothes and such.

Christmas day we relaxed at home and then in the evening we headed out to the country to our friends house to have Christmas with her and her family. We ate good food and had more presents. She got my the 70th Anniversary edition of Gone With the Wind!! So happy about that, Hubs isn't but I am. He thinks its a stupid movie. What does he know about classic dramatic films?? He got the Smurfs and a documentary for Christmas. Leave the choosing of classic films to me! ~Smile~

So like I said the Lovelocks had a very merry Christmas but with all the fun and eating I think the best part about for me was remembering why we do all this. I got a fresh view of Christmas this year. I have always known why we celebrate Christmas, but this year I just feel like I revived that which I think I had taken for granted. Jesus Christ was born to die. Lived to teach. Came to save that which is lost. I hope during that you all had a chance to reflect on the "reason for the season" and the hope which that small babe brought to us all.

I am so grateful for the best gift ever~~Jesus Christ, my Saviour.

With the Right Weapon I Am Dangerous, Pt. 2

For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds.~~2 Corinthians 10:4

We are warriors, fighting a spiritual battle. While sometimes it is good and/or necessary to simply stand, other times we are fighting off the enemies attacks and playing offense. I, by no means, am down playing or saying its wrong or sinful to STAND. There have been many times in my life where all I could do was stand and let others fight for me. Its not wrong to stand, but there are times where we stand there so long that we look down and we up to our calves in mud because we haven't moved in so long. Don't get stuck. See the problem with being in STAND mode is we sometimes get comfortable there. Its easier to leave the heavy fighting for our fellow soldiers, but eventually we have to come out of STAND mode and join the battle again. Actually in this scripture (Ephesians 6:13), stand meant still keeping your armor on, still watching and praying and still battle ready. We often times interpret it to me that for right now I get to just take a break. Even when standing we should be fighting off the devil.

As spiritual warriors we fight battles that we can't see, therefore we must use the correct weapons to win these battles. Paul was letting the church in Corinth know that our weapons aren't made by man, but that our weapons are only mighty through God~removing any doubt that God did it. The Corinthians prided themselves on their knowledge and philosophies. The word strong hold means a fortified place, a place of security. When are fighting battles, oft times we are spiritually coming against strongholds. Depression, anxiety, alcoholism, drug addiction (or any addiction really) and many other things, can be a stronghold.

So what weapons do you use to fight battles and to tear down strongholds in our cities, our personal lives and the lives of those we love??

The Word~~enough said about that!!
Faith~~you can't pray something through without it!!

Prayer~~most battles are fought through our prayers. We plead the blood, binding and loosing, dispatching angels and praying the Word.

Praise~~nothing says "Satan shut up and get out of here", like praising God when the battle is hard, when it doesn't make sense. We are making a statement when we praise God through ALL things. Satan expects us to back into a corner and stop fighting, that makes his job (1 Peter 5:8) easier.

God gave us all an arsenal. What you do with your weapons is up to you. You can choose to sit the battle out and hope it passes soon or you can stand up and fight.

I've been in church my whole life. I know about spiritual warfare in and out. But for the last several months I've been under siege and a lot of the time it was all I could do to fend off the attack, let alone take new ground. I was fighting, fighting, fighting but not moving forward. I realized that I needed to increase me faith, that was step one and then I needed to pull my boots out of the mud and say "no more Satan, I'm taking new ground!" So my fight is now mobile.

My head is down, my shield in front, my sword is sharp. I am in battle stance and I am on the move.



~~I hope these posts can encourage someone. They were definitely not meant to make anyone feel bad.~~

Commercial Break~~~BREAKING NEWS

I am interrupting my posts on spiritual warfare for a Lovelock update. Check back tomorrow for part 2 of "With the Right Weapons, I Am Dangerous".

I have big news, really big news. No, I am not pregnant for those who read this blog that would love for there to be another Lovelock. The big news is that Daniel is WALKING. And by walking I mean walking everywhere, getting into everything and pretty much keeping me on my toes. . . . and I couldn't be happier! He has made HUGE progress in all aspects of his development in the last two months, he is quickly becoming "age appropriate".

I am also thrilled and over the moon to report that the doctors have ruled out Fragile X, chromosome disorders, metabolic disorders and cerebral palsy. We did however see a neurosurgeon to rule out hydroencephalitis. She ruled that out and found something else. Benign Extra Axillary Fluid Collection of Infancy, I know right?!?!? That's a sentence by itself. Anyway, it's a big long title for something very simple that resolves itself on it's own!! How great is that?? I mean, I'd rather there be nothing, I'd rather it start with benign and resolve on it's own. It's extra fluid between the brain and skull that didn't absorb as fast as it should and usually completely absorbs by age two. It can however cause developmental delays (ding ding ding) and after therapy the kiddos catch up and have no lasting effects from it. YAY and HALLELUJAH and THANK YA JESUS and, well you see that I am grateful, thankful and thrilled!!! God is truly faithful and AWESOME! These are all testamonies to God's great and awesome healing power. I have no doubt that Daniel had major problems and we watched as God unfolded a miracle right before us. Now, as in he wasn't before, he is speeding through his therapy goals at break neck speed. Also, he has had no muscle tightness in his neck, shoulder or torso for close to a month! Another HUGE miracle.

Now I have to go because Daniel is throwing trash out of my kitchen trash can and I must stop now because I am over using the caps lock button!

Have a happy Saturday!!

With the Right Weapon I Am Dangerous, Part 1

I am a child of God, a wife, a mother, a teacher, a laundry folder, a dishwasher, a house cleaner and I am also a warrior. I wear armor, I carry a BIG shield and I also wield a sword.

I think I made it pretty clear in yesterday's post that we are fighting a battle. Today I want to talk about weapons, well and tomorrow too. Yesterday I talked about the shield of faith and how it's not just protection, but can also put out some pretty hefty blows (let Satan get too close and I'll bonk him over the head with my faith). But in spiritual warfare we have the greatest, most precise weapon there is: the Word of God.

For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.~~Hebrews 4:12

When charging at your enemy you should be properly armed. You can't fight Satan, and win, without the Word of God. Spiritual warfare requires spiritual weapons. There is a reason for hiding the Word in your heart. First, of course, is so that you don't sin against God (Psalm 119:11), but also for the purposes of battle. Hiding the Word deep in your heart puts it in your hand at all times. When Satan comes against you, you have your weapons close~you don't have to run and find them.

The Word of God is strong and sure and never changes. It is also beautiful and comforting and full of promises. The Word of God has the power to take down enemies and lift up the discouraged. Wield your weapon carefully and with precision. So many times we forget that we have the weapons we need. We lose sight of the goal, we become discouraged and then we sit down and let the enemy run over us. Even in STAND mode, you don't let go of your sword. The enemy has no power where we don't let him have power. God is the only all powerful one. Don't give your enemy place. Hold firm to your faith and grab your sword and let your enemy know where you stand.

My head is down and I am poised for battle, I have my shield and I am wielding my sword.

No Longer In the "Stand" Position

Ephesions 6:11-17~~~Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness; And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace; Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:

I cannot tell you how many times I have done all and then just stood. No longer on the offensive, just standing. That's been me for a while now. Just standing~protecting myself and my family from the blows the devil keeps throwing my way. This past weekend we went to St. Louis to visit. It was a great trip. Great to see friends, great to just relax a little bit, but it was also great in another way.

So many times over the years God has proven himself to me. God has shown me time and time again that my fear is unwarranted and that He's got my back~~so to speak. Yet still, in my carnal ways I would still worry and spend my time in fear or stress, over many things. I've been under spiritual attack many different times and sometimes for long periods of time. I know how to do spiritual battle, but yet I would always succumb to fear eventually. Over the past three months God has really been dealing with me about faith. Faith for provision, faith for the battle, faith that He does see and know where I am and what I am going through. Faith, faith, faith. Well, ya don't have to hit me over the head with a brick for me to know that I need to work on my faith! So I set out on a prayer journey for faith.

Over this past weekend, my faith took a turn. . . actually more of a leap. I want to bring out one scripture from above and then I'll share with you what happened.

Ephesians 6:16~~Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.~~I love this scripture. Here is some explanation:
**Above all in the scripture actually means--over all, covering all. The shield was meant to cover all the other parts of the armor, your first defensive so to speak. The shield here was not those little round buckler, but rather Paul was referring to the large Roman shield, which was actually 4 feet long and 2 and half feet wide~~like a door. Fiery darts were actually missiles hand made and launched by hand. They fashioned them with combustibles and all sorts of stuff and the only thing that could protect you from them was a shield.**

There were many times in my life where all I could do was stand. There's nothing wrong with that, the Bible speaks of it clearly. Sometimes all you can do is protect yourself and survive the battle. But we weren't created to just stand all the time, we are warriors~~spiritual ones, but warriors none the less. Sometimes the Romans would use their shields in an offensive move. Imagine with me for a moment, that you are the leader of a small band of cut-throat thieves trying to come against a Roman battalion. Them with their gleaming bronze armor, feathered helmets and of course those huge, thick, heavy shields. You (the cut-thoat band of thieves) decide that it's time to attack and you begin to sneak (or so you think) up on the soliders. The soliders (who were well trained, ruthless warriors) quickly pulled together in formation and knowing that they outnumbered you they began toward you. Heads down, shields so high all they could do was see and with assuredness of a win, ran at you, completely in sync with each other. Imagine a bronze wall running toward you with the strength of not just numbers, but power, might and heartlessness (we all know the Romans were cruel and bloody people). Suddenly you and your band of cut throats realize you don't stand a chance and you flee, hoping to get away with your life.

God shook me up this weekend and during prayer showed me what I need to do. Too many times we let the enemy get too close. We allow the devil to come into our camp and let him take what he wants because fighting right now is just too hard. And a rag tag enemy that is weak and doesn't stand a chance against you, gets away with all the spoils he can carry. We are left feeling defeated. My faith is not just my defense for when Satan launches a fiery dart from a safe distance away. My faith is also my offense to charge at him when necessary. My faith is also what I hold out in front of me to clear a path. When the way is dark or unclear, my faith is in front of me protecting me. "For we walk by faith, not by sight:" 2 Corinthians 5:7 When those fiery darts are heading my direction, all I have to do is lift my shield over me and let 'em bounce off. When Satan thinks he's sneaking up on me, I have the power and the might (the Holy Ghost) to drive him away! Emotions are dangerous in this battle, emotions get you killed, the Roman war machine knew that. When I am wondering how I am going to make my way over this seemingly unclear, over grown path I can use my faith to clear a way. I need to stop analyzing with my physical eyes because physical eyes can't see it. I need to let my faith soar, stop clipping it's wings. I will not be an ostrich, settling for a flightless life, hiding my head in the sand waiting for the bad things to go away. I will be an eagle and soar high above, confident in the God I serve.

So my head is down, my shield is high and I am charging straight at the enemy. Just let Satan try and stop me. See, I'm not just standing right now.

~~Come tomorrow because I am going to talk weapons baby. The most powerful weapon known to man or devil.~~