Today would have been Nathaniel's 13th birthday! Wow! That is hard for me to even imagine.
See I still see him as that three year old that was filled up with joy and laughter. It's hard for me to even try to imagine what he would look like, act like or anything else. He is frozen in my mind at 3 years old. While I would love to know what he would be like, I'm okay with that 3 year old image. He was a precious boy, so I'm filled up with good memories.
So today I might be a little sad. Today I might cry because I miss him. But I know I will smile because of my fond memories. I know I will chuckle while looking at his sweet pictures. And I know he is in a better place, with no ouchies, no pain and no struggles. While this mama longs for a chance to hug him, I also take great peace in knowing he is completely healed. . . as completely as one can get.
Here is a post I wrote 4 years ago. . . .
Joyous Warrior
I'll be back on Monday. This weekend I shall soak up every minute I can with my family. I know all too well that you may not have as long as you think. Never take them for granted.
Showing posts with label Nathaniel. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Nathaniel. Show all posts
Saturday, May 11, 2013
Sunday, August 22, 2010
The Day I Left My Heart at Children's Hospital (repost)
I originally posted this last year, same day. Not much has changed in my feelings. I will post again tomorrow. Blessings!!
I had his back pack of toys. I had his clothes and shoes. I had his beloved afaghan and monkey. I was leaving. Leaving the hospital for the first time in three weeks. Hubs and I were leaving together, but I was without my baby. My heart was still on the seventh floor. I was empty. I was broken. Hubs and I walked down that long bridge way to the car. Tears streaming down our faces. No one knew why, no one cared. I didn't really expect them too. (Looking back on that, I am glad no one stopped us, because I probably would have ran back upstairs)
So many times I have relived his last five days. In the first three months I relived those last five days almost everyday. Countless times in the first year, I hashed over those days and all the emotion they contained. I remember the waiting and watching for something to change. I still feel that pain of when the doctor called time of death. He could have stabbed me right then and it would not have hurt worse. My beloved Nathaniel was gone.
Seven years have passed. I can breathe again. For the first few months, grief would steal my breathe, like bricks sitting on my chest. I don't cry everyday anymore. I can smile when I look at a picture of him and remember the funny things he did and said. I used to tell people that I reserved the right to break down at any time without warning. I still reserve that right, I just don't use it as often. I still question my self. "Did I do everything right? Did I do something wrong? Somehow I must have caused this." Mommy guilt covers a lot of things, even death. Deep down I know, I know there is nothing I could have done. Still sometimes I catch myself wondering, "what if".
On his birthday every year I am sad because he isn't here to celebrate and watch grow up and all the things we didn't get to see him do and be. It's a hard day. The anniversary of his death is harder, because I relive his death. Maybe I am the only grieving parent that does this, but somehow I don't think I am. I can't explain why, I just do. I think part of me doesn't want to forget. Grief sometimes can't explain itself, I've learned to stop trying.
I am blessed. Life went on. Part of me didn't expect it too, but it did. It was impossible, on my own. I am not strong. I am weak and broken, but God isn't. God has brought me through the fog of grief. He carried me when I didn't even want to be carried. He soothed me, comforted me, surrounded me with the BEST family and church family anyone could ask for, put a Pastor in my life I could lean on, and lean on him I did, we did. Do I still grieve? Yes, I am sitting here with tears streaming down my face in abundance. But I don't grieve everyday. The tears are a release, a cleansing. I weep, and I mean weep, in May and August. But I remember, with joy, every single day.
To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.~~Isaiah 61:3
I am splashing around in the oil of joy and I wear my brightly colored garment of praise everyday!! Because God appointed them unto me! My heart still aches and it will always have a little ache but, the oil of joy soothes it.
Nathaniel Phillip Lovelock
May 11, 2000-August 22, 2003
I had his back pack of toys. I had his clothes and shoes. I had his beloved afaghan and monkey. I was leaving. Leaving the hospital for the first time in three weeks. Hubs and I were leaving together, but I was without my baby. My heart was still on the seventh floor. I was empty. I was broken. Hubs and I walked down that long bridge way to the car. Tears streaming down our faces. No one knew why, no one cared. I didn't really expect them too. (Looking back on that, I am glad no one stopped us, because I probably would have ran back upstairs)
So many times I have relived his last five days. In the first three months I relived those last five days almost everyday. Countless times in the first year, I hashed over those days and all the emotion they contained. I remember the waiting and watching for something to change. I still feel that pain of when the doctor called time of death. He could have stabbed me right then and it would not have hurt worse. My beloved Nathaniel was gone.
Seven years have passed. I can breathe again. For the first few months, grief would steal my breathe, like bricks sitting on my chest. I don't cry everyday anymore. I can smile when I look at a picture of him and remember the funny things he did and said. I used to tell people that I reserved the right to break down at any time without warning. I still reserve that right, I just don't use it as often. I still question my self. "Did I do everything right? Did I do something wrong? Somehow I must have caused this." Mommy guilt covers a lot of things, even death. Deep down I know, I know there is nothing I could have done. Still sometimes I catch myself wondering, "what if".
On his birthday every year I am sad because he isn't here to celebrate and watch grow up and all the things we didn't get to see him do and be. It's a hard day. The anniversary of his death is harder, because I relive his death. Maybe I am the only grieving parent that does this, but somehow I don't think I am. I can't explain why, I just do. I think part of me doesn't want to forget. Grief sometimes can't explain itself, I've learned to stop trying.
I am blessed. Life went on. Part of me didn't expect it too, but it did. It was impossible, on my own. I am not strong. I am weak and broken, but God isn't. God has brought me through the fog of grief. He carried me when I didn't even want to be carried. He soothed me, comforted me, surrounded me with the BEST family and church family anyone could ask for, put a Pastor in my life I could lean on, and lean on him I did, we did. Do I still grieve? Yes, I am sitting here with tears streaming down my face in abundance. But I don't grieve everyday. The tears are a release, a cleansing. I weep, and I mean weep, in May and August. But I remember, with joy, every single day.
To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.~~Isaiah 61:3
I am splashing around in the oil of joy and I wear my brightly colored garment of praise everyday!! Because God appointed them unto me! My heart still aches and it will always have a little ache but, the oil of joy soothes it.
Nathaniel Phillip Lovelock
May 11, 2000-August 22, 2003
Monday, February 8, 2010
"Chicken and Mac-e Cheese"
I am not sure of what to write today, so you all are getting a post off the cuff. This is it, as it rolls out of my brain.
This week is Congenital Heart Disease Awareness Week. Statistics say that 81 babies everyday in the United States are born with CHD. Some parents, like my Hubs and I, know in advance at least some of the problems before the baby is born and other parents are not as fortunate and are completely caught off guard. CHD, if undiagnosed can cause heart failure suddenly and is one of the leading causes in juvenile sporting event deaths. My precious Nathaniel is a CHD statistic. He is the reason I walk in the Heart Walk. He is the reason I spend all of February focusing on heart month. He is the reason I take candy up to the nurses on the heart floor at Children's Hospital once a year. This year I made broaches for myself, my mom and a twitter friend. I am also making pins for the people that will be walking with me in the heart walk. Awareness of CHD WILL save lives.
I guess, because I have been doing a lot of talking about Nathaniel in the last few days my emotions are just a little exposed, more so than usual. Yesterday in church they sang a beautiful song. I love the song, but it was one of the songs they sang at Nathaniel's funeral. I bawled and bawled. It took me straight back to his funeral, it was as if I was there, all over again. Don't get me wrong I have relived his death and funeral many times, but last night as I sat there listening and crying I did what I normally do~I recall the last thing he ever said to me. Remembering, hearing his little voice in my head always brought me comfort. His voice is fading. It's getting harder to remember what he sounded like. It was hard for me to recall last night, it took longer to remember (which probably accounted for a lot of those tears). I don't like that. I don't want to forget what he sounded like. In the first few weeks after his death I would wake up startled because I thought I heard him calling for me and now I am having a hard time remembering his voice. Last night was the first time in awhile I tried to recall his voice and it upset me when I had a hard time remembering.
So when I went to bed last night I prayed. I prayed for peace. I was really struggling. I told God that I didn't want to forget. I went to sleep and I dreamed of Nathaniel. Sweet happy dreams. I could hear him singing, playing, laughing and saying mama. I needed that.
I miss my baby boy. I will always miss him. I will have a few days now and again where my grief is raw and real. But the days that I think of him and smile now far outnumber painful days. Though grief is real and hard and overwhelming at times, eventually it gets better and you find yourself surviving, just surviving, your loss. Then over time you realize that you aren't just surviving, you are thriving despite the loss and moving forward.
Today's heart tip is simply to hug someone, an extra long I am so glad you are in my life and what would I do without you, hug. Its amazing what a hug will do for you and the one you are hugging.
*Chicken and Mac-e cheese was the last thing Nathaniel ever said to me, besides calling for mama.
This week is Congenital Heart Disease Awareness Week. Statistics say that 81 babies everyday in the United States are born with CHD. Some parents, like my Hubs and I, know in advance at least some of the problems before the baby is born and other parents are not as fortunate and are completely caught off guard. CHD, if undiagnosed can cause heart failure suddenly and is one of the leading causes in juvenile sporting event deaths. My precious Nathaniel is a CHD statistic. He is the reason I walk in the Heart Walk. He is the reason I spend all of February focusing on heart month. He is the reason I take candy up to the nurses on the heart floor at Children's Hospital once a year. This year I made broaches for myself, my mom and a twitter friend. I am also making pins for the people that will be walking with me in the heart walk. Awareness of CHD WILL save lives.
I guess, because I have been doing a lot of talking about Nathaniel in the last few days my emotions are just a little exposed, more so than usual. Yesterday in church they sang a beautiful song. I love the song, but it was one of the songs they sang at Nathaniel's funeral. I bawled and bawled. It took me straight back to his funeral, it was as if I was there, all over again. Don't get me wrong I have relived his death and funeral many times, but last night as I sat there listening and crying I did what I normally do~I recall the last thing he ever said to me. Remembering, hearing his little voice in my head always brought me comfort. His voice is fading. It's getting harder to remember what he sounded like. It was hard for me to recall last night, it took longer to remember (which probably accounted for a lot of those tears). I don't like that. I don't want to forget what he sounded like. In the first few weeks after his death I would wake up startled because I thought I heard him calling for me and now I am having a hard time remembering his voice. Last night was the first time in awhile I tried to recall his voice and it upset me when I had a hard time remembering.
So when I went to bed last night I prayed. I prayed for peace. I was really struggling. I told God that I didn't want to forget. I went to sleep and I dreamed of Nathaniel. Sweet happy dreams. I could hear him singing, playing, laughing and saying mama. I needed that.
I miss my baby boy. I will always miss him. I will have a few days now and again where my grief is raw and real. But the days that I think of him and smile now far outnumber painful days. Though grief is real and hard and overwhelming at times, eventually it gets better and you find yourself surviving, just surviving, your loss. Then over time you realize that you aren't just surviving, you are thriving despite the loss and moving forward.
Today's heart tip is simply to hug someone, an extra long I am so glad you are in my life and what would I do without you, hug. Its amazing what a hug will do for you and the one you are hugging.
*Chicken and Mac-e cheese was the last thing Nathaniel ever said to me, besides calling for mama.
Saturday, August 22, 2009
The Day I Left My Heart At Children's Hospital
I had his back pack of toys. I had his clothes and shoes. I had his beloved afaghan and monkey. I was leaving. Leaving the hospital for the first time in three weeks. Hubs and I were leaving together, but I was without my baby. My heart was still on the seventh floor. I was empty. I was broken. Hubs and I walked down that long bridge way to the car. Tears streaming down our faces. No one knew why, no one cared. I didn't really expect them too. (Looking back on that, I am glad no one stopped us, because I probably would have ran back upstairs)
So many times I have relived his last five days. In the first three months I relived those last five days almost everyday. Countless times in the first year, I hashed over those days and all the emotion they contained. I remember the waiting and watching for something to change. I still feel that pain of when the doctor called time of death. He could have stabbed me right then and it would not have hurt worse. My beloved Nathaniel was gone.
Six years have passed. I can breathe again. For the first few months, grief would steal my breathe, like bricks sitting on my chest. I don't cry everyday anymore. I can smile when I look at a picture of him and remember the funny things he did and said. I used to tell people that I reserved the right to break down at any time without warning. I still reserve that right, I just don't use it as often. I still question my self. "Did I do everything right? Did I do something wrong? Somehow I must have caused this." Mommy guilt covers a lot of things, even death. Deep down I know, I know there is nothing I could have done. Still sometimes I catch myself wondering, "what if".
On his birthday every year I am sad because he isn't here to celebrate and watch grow up and all the things we didn't get to see him do and be. It's a hard day. The anniversary of his death is harder, because I relive his death. Maybe I am the only grieving parent that does this, but somehow I don't think I am. I can't explain why, I just do. I think part of me doesn't want to forget. Grief sometimes can't explain itself, I've learned to stop trying.
I am blessed. Life went on. Part of me didn't expect it too, but it did. It was impossible, on my own. I am not strong. I am weak and broken, but God isn't. God has brought me through the fog of grief. He carried me when I didn't even want to be carried. He soothed me, comforted me, surrounded me with the BEST family and church family anyone could ask for, put a Pastor in my life I could lean on, and lean on him I did, we did. Do I still grieve? Yes, I am sitting here with tears streaming down my face in abundance. But I don't grieve everyday. The tears are a release, a cleansing. I weep, and I mean weep, in May and August. But I remember, with joy, every single day.
To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.~~Isaiah 61:3
I am splashing around in the oil of joy and I wear my brightly colored garment of praise everyday!! Because God appointed them unto me! My heart still aches and it will always have a little ache but, the oil of joy soothes it.
Nathaniel Phillip Lovelock
May 11, 2000-August 22, 2003
So many times I have relived his last five days. In the first three months I relived those last five days almost everyday. Countless times in the first year, I hashed over those days and all the emotion they contained. I remember the waiting and watching for something to change. I still feel that pain of when the doctor called time of death. He could have stabbed me right then and it would not have hurt worse. My beloved Nathaniel was gone.
Six years have passed. I can breathe again. For the first few months, grief would steal my breathe, like bricks sitting on my chest. I don't cry everyday anymore. I can smile when I look at a picture of him and remember the funny things he did and said. I used to tell people that I reserved the right to break down at any time without warning. I still reserve that right, I just don't use it as often. I still question my self. "Did I do everything right? Did I do something wrong? Somehow I must have caused this." Mommy guilt covers a lot of things, even death. Deep down I know, I know there is nothing I could have done. Still sometimes I catch myself wondering, "what if".
On his birthday every year I am sad because he isn't here to celebrate and watch grow up and all the things we didn't get to see him do and be. It's a hard day. The anniversary of his death is harder, because I relive his death. Maybe I am the only grieving parent that does this, but somehow I don't think I am. I can't explain why, I just do. I think part of me doesn't want to forget. Grief sometimes can't explain itself, I've learned to stop trying.
I am blessed. Life went on. Part of me didn't expect it too, but it did. It was impossible, on my own. I am not strong. I am weak and broken, but God isn't. God has brought me through the fog of grief. He carried me when I didn't even want to be carried. He soothed me, comforted me, surrounded me with the BEST family and church family anyone could ask for, put a Pastor in my life I could lean on, and lean on him I did, we did. Do I still grieve? Yes, I am sitting here with tears streaming down my face in abundance. But I don't grieve everyday. The tears are a release, a cleansing. I weep, and I mean weep, in May and August. But I remember, with joy, every single day.
To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.~~Isaiah 61:3
I am splashing around in the oil of joy and I wear my brightly colored garment of praise everyday!! Because God appointed them unto me! My heart still aches and it will always have a little ache but, the oil of joy soothes it.
Nathaniel Phillip Lovelock
May 11, 2000-August 22, 2003
Monday, May 11, 2009
Joyous Warrior
"I love paper hats!" 2/17/2003
Nine years ago today, Nathaniel Phillip made his appearance into this world. Only weighing in at 5 pounds 13 ounces, he was a little thing with big problems. My world was spinning. My first baby, he was finally here and I was so scared for him. Fear and joy, excited and anxious. Thirty minutes later, he was being wheeled out of my room, IV in place with the medicine that was keeping him alive, and over to Children's Hospital, home for the next two months. At six days old they wheeled him into the operating room for the first time, then again at 6 months old and then again at almost three years old.
Over the next three years, fear and joy, excitement and anxiety and hospital stays would be common place in my life. Through it all Nathaniel was the happiest and the most joy-filled little boy I have ever known. He lived life to the tilt! His smile was infectious, his laugh was contagious and his cuddles were priceless.
He was a very analytical little boy. He separated his blocks based on their colors, and then built a tower with each color. He separated his Captain Crunch Crunch Berries cereal into the three separate colors and then ate each color before moving to the next color. He loved looking at books. There isn't any activity he didn't enjoy.
Nathaniel faced many battles in three, way to short years and he faced them with a big smile, always. Sure he cried when the "ouchies" came, but he wasn't a cranky child because of it. Often times I have wondered if I face my battles with the same courage and joy that my little guy possessed. I doubt it.
He loved everyone he met and would hug them if they offered. He waved at the people in the check out lines as we were leaving whatever store we were in. He shared his joy with everyone and when you were with him you could feel his joy and shared in it.
After his funeral I told mothers of young children to never take their little ones for granted, because you may not have them as long as you think you will. If I had known he wouldn't still be here, maybe we would have read just one more story at bedtime or played bubbles a little longer. It's those things I ponder.
I told people around me after he passed away that I reserved the right to break down crying at any time without prior warning. I still reserve the right, I just don't use it very often--but today I will. Today I will remember and cry and laugh and smile and cry some more.
Nathaniel would have be nine today. I can only imagine what he would be like. He would have been an amazing nine year old and big brother.
Enjoying Sunday afternoon by reading the funny pages. He was mimicking daddy. Daddy was on the other side of the table reading the paper too.
He heard me taking his picture and looked to see what was going on because my friend and I were laughing quietly at him being so cute! 2/24/2003
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Lace Up Those Sneakers and Let's START!
BIG News!!! Drum roll please. . . . .
I'm officially in training. Training to participate in a 5K, this mama is lacing up her pink and white tennis shoes to walk in the American Heart Association START! Heart Walk on May 2nd, in St. Louis. I am so excited!
I have wanted to walk in it for several years now, but this year I am doing it! I first considered it a few years back, walking in Nathaniel's memory, but I didn't. So this year, I decided, there is no time like the present and I am going to walk. I'm walking for several reasons. These are in no particular order--personal accomplishment, to raise money and awareness to a cause that I am passionate about (and hits very closely to my heart) and it is something productive to do annually in honor of Nathaniel. The most important reason being the last one. According to the AMA 36,000 children are born with a heart defect each year! I was a mama with a baby in that statistic group almost 9 years ago and if it hadn't been for research and research funding, my precious Nathaniel wouldn't have lived past 15 minutes, literally. I also want to add that I believe that God's a healer. First and fore most prayer should go up for those dealing with or born with heart disease, but I also believe that God gave some people the brilliance to work on these kiddos and others to be giving enough to fund the brilliant. So let me say, emphatically, that God brought Nathaniel through those three years and he used some very kind, amazing, brilliant and talented people to complete that task! I know that the Great Physician guided our earthly physicians and what a team they made!!
~~Shout out to Dr. Eric Medelloff (the surgeon), Dr. David Balzer (Nathaniels primary Cardiac doc) the Cardiac Team and the fabulous staff of St. Louis Children's Hospital!! You guys ROCK!!~~
Team Nathaniel has been formed. I have a personal web page through the AMA and a Team Page. Right now the team is me, I haven't started recruiting yet, so if you want to join me you are more than welcome. I shouldn't really say it's just me. Makiah is walking with me and I am pushing the boys. This is a family event. Hubs will be designing a Team Nathaniel t-shirt for those walking. If you can't walk, but you want to help, sponsoring is good too. No pressure to do either, I just wanted to share with all of you what I am doing. Joining and/or sponsoring can be done on those two web pages. Join on the team page and donations can be made on my personal page.
Now, here's your heart tip for Saturday: go nuts!! You have now been given permission to go nuts--walnuts, cashews, flaxseeds or sesame seeds, macadamias and most importantly almonds. Nuts pack a healthy punch for your heart by providing some healthy fats. They also give you something crunchy to munch on with the benefit of it being good for you. Watch out for the salted ones, they pack too much sodium! I like to add raw nuts to my salads or throw them in my chicken meals. Pack some to munch on during those walks for a nutritious boost of energy or as a cure for the afternoon drag. One serving at a time is just perfect for great health!
Gotta run now, do some cleaning, then off to celebrate Dad. Tomorrow is his birthday! I'll be posting pics tomorrow of my wonderful daddy!
I hope everyone is having a splendid Saturday!!
I'm officially in training. Training to participate in a 5K, this mama is lacing up her pink and white tennis shoes to walk in the American Heart Association START! Heart Walk on May 2nd, in St. Louis. I am so excited!
I have wanted to walk in it for several years now, but this year I am doing it! I first considered it a few years back, walking in Nathaniel's memory, but I didn't. So this year, I decided, there is no time like the present and I am going to walk. I'm walking for several reasons. These are in no particular order--personal accomplishment, to raise money and awareness to a cause that I am passionate about (and hits very closely to my heart) and it is something productive to do annually in honor of Nathaniel. The most important reason being the last one. According to the AMA 36,000 children are born with a heart defect each year! I was a mama with a baby in that statistic group almost 9 years ago and if it hadn't been for research and research funding, my precious Nathaniel wouldn't have lived past 15 minutes, literally. I also want to add that I believe that God's a healer. First and fore most prayer should go up for those dealing with or born with heart disease, but I also believe that God gave some people the brilliance to work on these kiddos and others to be giving enough to fund the brilliant. So let me say, emphatically, that God brought Nathaniel through those three years and he used some very kind, amazing, brilliant and talented people to complete that task! I know that the Great Physician guided our earthly physicians and what a team they made!!
~~Shout out to Dr. Eric Medelloff (the surgeon), Dr. David Balzer (Nathaniels primary Cardiac doc) the Cardiac Team and the fabulous staff of St. Louis Children's Hospital!! You guys ROCK!!~~
Team Nathaniel has been formed. I have a personal web page through the AMA and a Team Page. Right now the team is me, I haven't started recruiting yet, so if you want to join me you are more than welcome. I shouldn't really say it's just me. Makiah is walking with me and I am pushing the boys. This is a family event. Hubs will be designing a Team Nathaniel t-shirt for those walking. If you can't walk, but you want to help, sponsoring is good too. No pressure to do either, I just wanted to share with all of you what I am doing. Joining and/or sponsoring can be done on those two web pages. Join on the team page and donations can be made on my personal page.
Now, here's your heart tip for Saturday: go nuts!! You have now been given permission to go nuts--walnuts, cashews, flaxseeds or sesame seeds, macadamias and most importantly almonds. Nuts pack a healthy punch for your heart by providing some healthy fats. They also give you something crunchy to munch on with the benefit of it being good for you. Watch out for the salted ones, they pack too much sodium! I like to add raw nuts to my salads or throw them in my chicken meals. Pack some to munch on during those walks for a nutritious boost of energy or as a cure for the afternoon drag. One serving at a time is just perfect for great health!
Gotta run now, do some cleaning, then off to celebrate Dad. Tomorrow is his birthday! I'll be posting pics tomorrow of my wonderful daddy!
I hope everyone is having a splendid Saturday!!
Monday, February 2, 2009
Lub-Dub, Lub-Dub, Lub-Dub. . . What a Lovely Sound
February is National Heart Month.
I have sort of a passion for heart health awareness. Heart health that we can control and the diseases we can't. Our oldest son, Nathaniel, was born with congenital heart disease. He underwent his first open heart surgery when he was six days old, then another at 9 months old and then another a month before he turned 3. He also had several (by several I mean 13) heart catheterizations. Nathaniel laughed, smiled, played and enjoyed life. Though is life was short. He passed away 5 years ago, just a few months past age 3. Just looking at Nathaniel you would never know anything was wrong. He was the happiest child I have ever seen and that includes his siblings.
Though, at this moment in life, I am not the most gleaming example of health (I'm working on it), I do believe that people should be more heart health conscience, hence the Great Slim Down of '09. Especially women, we have a tendency to focus on everything and everyone else, while heart disease is the leading killer among women today.
So I decided that I would post a heart healthy tip or recipe everyday of the month of February, along with my usually stellar posts!
Today's tip~~Be sure to include dark leafy veggies in your diet. Arugula, Spinach, Kale, Mustard Greens, Chicory and Collard Greens are some to try. They make a great side dish or slip them into a pasta dish for a new twist on things. They are a great source of vitamin A, C, fiber and calcium. The darker the leaves the more nutrient rich.
Also during the month many retailers help out the American Heart Association by asking patrons to add a dollar to their bill. I encourage everyone to do that at least once. It's only a dollar and it goes to research. I can't help but think that it was someone's dollar(s) that helped get the information and technology that helped Nathaniel live as long as he did and as well as he did.
Nathaniel~~age 2 He loved being silly and smiley.
~~The tips I am posting are things I have collected over the years. If it isn't mine then I will credit where it came from.
I have sort of a passion for heart health awareness. Heart health that we can control and the diseases we can't. Our oldest son, Nathaniel, was born with congenital heart disease. He underwent his first open heart surgery when he was six days old, then another at 9 months old and then another a month before he turned 3. He also had several (by several I mean 13) heart catheterizations. Nathaniel laughed, smiled, played and enjoyed life. Though is life was short. He passed away 5 years ago, just a few months past age 3. Just looking at Nathaniel you would never know anything was wrong. He was the happiest child I have ever seen and that includes his siblings.
Though, at this moment in life, I am not the most gleaming example of health (I'm working on it), I do believe that people should be more heart health conscience, hence the Great Slim Down of '09. Especially women, we have a tendency to focus on everything and everyone else, while heart disease is the leading killer among women today.
So I decided that I would post a heart healthy tip or recipe everyday of the month of February, along with my usually stellar posts!
Today's tip~~Be sure to include dark leafy veggies in your diet. Arugula, Spinach, Kale, Mustard Greens, Chicory and Collard Greens are some to try. They make a great side dish or slip them into a pasta dish for a new twist on things. They are a great source of vitamin A, C, fiber and calcium. The darker the leaves the more nutrient rich.
Also during the month many retailers help out the American Heart Association by asking patrons to add a dollar to their bill. I encourage everyone to do that at least once. It's only a dollar and it goes to research. I can't help but think that it was someone's dollar(s) that helped get the information and technology that helped Nathaniel live as long as he did and as well as he did.
Nathaniel~~age 2 He loved being silly and smiley.
~~The tips I am posting are things I have collected over the years. If it isn't mine then I will credit where it came from.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Would Have Been Eight
My beautiful firstborn son would have been eight years old yesterday. Mother's Day was a little bittersweet this year. Though I am very blessed and enjoyed my time with my children and husband, my mind couldn't help but wonder to the child I didn't get to celebrate yesterday. My Nathaniel passed away when he was three, putting an end to all the "ouchies" (as he called them) for him, and creating a big ouchy for all of us left here.
Thank you Jesus for carrying my onward. . . Jesus you truly are my Comforter.
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